“I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry!” I pleaded with Luis to forgive me. I held on to Junior for dear life, afraid he might fall off or something. Junior’s head was turning dark purple. Oh My God! I did that when I banged him on the table! NO!
I can’t believe it. I’ve killed Junior. I heard my parents and realized what I was doing. I was on my knees, holding my boyfriends penis! Looking up, I first saw Mom. She was frozen, mouth opened. Shocked no doubt at the slutty behavior of her daughter. When I looked at Daddy, I was in tears and couldn’t see well. Surely he is going to yell and scream. Then he’s going to throw Luis out and ground me for life.
Even in my panic I realized I was hearing sounds I didn’t expect. My Father was roaring with laughter. My Mother let out a few squeaks and started laughing hard as well. What? Then I heard Luis start to chuckle. Did you know, he rumbles when he chuckles?
What is going on here?!? By now, my parents are falling all over themselves. I could tell they were trying to suppress their laughter, yet every time one would calm down, the other would start right back up again.
“Like mother, like daughter.” My Father got out between fits, earning a smack on his arm from Mom.
“What’s going on?” I heard Jason ask.
“Nothing.” My Mother choked out. “Why don’t you and Cheryl step out for a minute, okay?”
“Whatever.” Apparently Jason and Cheryl got up to leave.
“Honey, you might want to lighten your grip. You don’t want to break it off.” Mom said, still chuckling.
“But, I think I killed it.” I started crying big time. Mom was instantly by my side whispering love into my ear.
“It’s okay, Becky. Everything is fine.” She kept reassuring me. After I started to calm down, she suggested I let off the pressure.
I looked up at Luis. He had a really freaked out expression on his face. As soon as I realized it was probably my death grip on Junior, I relaxed and let go. I’ve killed Junior! I was playing with his penis in front of my parents!
I’m a slut.
I wanted to run to my room. I wanted to hide in my art. I wanted to get lost in my writing. I wanted to put clothes on and hide. I really wanted to let go of this world and bring back the world I owned. Being naked didn’t matter, but I can’t hide that way. I let the curtain of my hair do its best for the moment.
After Jason and Cheryl left, my Father spoke to Luis. “Stand up, please.”
“Sir?” In less than a second, a thousand emotions ran across My Mountain’s face. I know I was as confused—no, perplexed.
“Please, just stand up and trust me.” Dad’s voice was gentle, yet commanding.
CRAP! Sorry…. NO! It’s the way I feel. Damn, damn, damn! What is Daddy doing?
Slowly, Luis stood. His face red. His eyes didn’t contain fear, but a wariness. His hands automatically trying to hide Junior. He wasn’t fully hard, but still obvious, even with the size of those hands. His wariness turned to sheepishness.
“Luis, hold your head up. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You got an erection. I imagine that you had some assistance. Personally, I don’t want to know the details.” Luis tentatively nodded his head. “Son, your cock is the envy of most men and I imagine it has caused some problems in the past.”
“Yes sir, it has.” My father said cock? I better go place a bet on a snowballs chance!
“Look, it’s what you’ve got—what God gave you, don’t ever be ashamed of that. And, don’t ever be ashamed of getting an erection. Okay?”
“Yes sir.” Some of the wariness returned to My Mountain’s eyes. As if he were waiting for the other shoe to drop. D-do my parents think that’s the only reason I love him?
“Don’t worry, Luis. Actually, Helen and I are quite amused. That is, if you’re okay.”
“I’m fine. Actually, the treatment was almost worse than the injury.”
“Did I hurt you? I’m so sorry!” My eyes teared up again. The stairs are just around the corner, across the hall…
Luis wrapped me up into his arms and pulled me to his chest. “No, sweetie, you didn’t.”
I was so relieved. I snuggled into him, My Cave. I didn’t even think when I said, “Good. I didn’t want to kill Junior before I had my way with him.”
Luis’s chest started shaking like he was trying to suppress a sneeze or something. Behind me, I heard some snorts and snickers. OH. MY. GOD! My parents heard that! My eyes flew open and I looked up.
That did it. All three burst out laughing. I really wanted to hide! My face must be scarlet by now. Appropriate for a slut. Maybe I should brand the A on my forehead.
“Sweetie, it’s okay.” Mom said. “Think about all you’ve been through in the past two days. How much has changed in you. You saw your boyfriend in distress, forgot all of us, and tried to tend to his cock.”
“What? Can’t I say cock? How about penis? Or, wanger? Wand? Johnson…”
“Tallywacker, rod, one-eyed trouser snake…” My Dad jumped in with.
“Willy, the one-eyed wonder worm…” My parents, at least I think it was them and not pod people, started laughing uncontrollably again. Even Luis was shaking with laughter.
“Sweetie, don’t you think we know this stuff?” Mom was red-faced trying to control her laughter. She took my hand and pulled me out of My Cave. Dad took Luis into the kitchen while Mom and I sat. “Honey, have you and Luis had sex yet?”
“MOM!” I know my jaw hit my lap, my eyes must be the size of the dinner plates, and I could feel myself turning as scarlet as the letter.
“Honey, I’m not prying. Really. It’s important that we talk. Talk about everything. We need to be completely honest with each other and trust each other. Sex is the most hidden topic of all. If we can be honest and feel comfortable telling each other about it, all else will be easy.” Mom’s voice was loving—caring. She was holding my hand the whole time.
“I’ll try, okay?” Mom nodded. “To answer your question, no, not yet…” I choked up a little.
“Becky, what’s the matter?”
“I-I… I’m a slut.” And the tears started.
“What!” Mom hugged me into her. “You’re not a slut. Your hormones just finally woke up.”
“It was only a matter of time. I’d guess that part of your hiding was repressing them.”
“Honey, have you felt like dragging anyone but Luis into the bushes?”
“Well…” I thought about PE and the shower yesterday and today. The looks I got from boys and girls. How those looks excited me. I remember, clearly, the look I had received yesterday and today from Rashad, a quiet boy in my art class. Then, I thought of the kiss today at lunch. “Yes. Rosalee.”
Mom actually giggled, then got serious again. “Does Luis know?”
“What did he say?”
“Go for it.”
“After L-luis and I-I… consummate.”
“Experimenting doesn’t make you a slut.” She said that with authority. Perhaps from experience?
“W-what if it’s not an experiment?”
“Then you’ll know something you didn’t know before.”
“You wouldn’t be upset? I-I mean, another girl…” Mom got a brief look of wistfulness in her eyes.
“If it makes you happy and doesn’t hurt anyone, how could I be upset?”
“Thanks. I love you.”
“I love you to. Now, what about you and Luis… when are you going to ‘consummate’?” She giggled while she did air quotes.
“I thought so. I thought it wouldn’t be a long wait.” She gave me a wink and a smile.
“Not if I can help it.” Damn! When I open up, I open up. Maybe I’m the pod person.
“Tomorrow night.” Mom’s eyebrows went up, yet she gently squeezed my hand.
“You sound pretty sure about it. It’s a big step. Are you ready?”
“More than. I talked to Mrs. Contadino last night. She doesn’t mind me spending the night there with Luis. S-she… encouraged it.” Finally, my sniffles were going away. “I know that a football player in season doesn’t have many nights during the week, so tomorrow night seemed the best time.”
“It doesn’t seem that way for Jason.” She chuckled, “After seeing him at the start of dinner…”
“And? Honesty, remember?”
“I know, Mom.” We shared a little giggle. “Seriously, apparently the physical demands on linemen are a lot different. Mrs. Contadino was telling me that it takes Luis most of the weekend to recover from a game. Often on Saturday, he never comes out of his room except to eat.”
“I can see that. His body must take a terrible pounding.”
“I’ll find out.” I took a deep breath and thought about the week. “That’s what worries me about Friday’s game. I think I’m a distraction and he might not be ready for it.”
“Well, for the game, we can sit together and worry together. I’ve gotten gray hairs in every game Jason has played in. As for you being a distraction… that’s something you and Luis need to work out. As long as you two communicate and be honest with each other, it will work out.”
“Thanks Mom. I’m sure sitting together will work. As for being honest, Luis insists on it.”
“Good. Now, back to tomorrow night. Are you sure?”
“More than I’ve ever been about anything.” I knew it at the core of my being.
She raised her eyebrows and just searched my face for signs. I was so positive, I knew in my heart so strongly, that I wasn’t even blushing.
“Two things, then we’ll get back to dinner. First, enjoy teasing Luis tonight, but be a little more attuned. Okay?” She looked like she was fighting down a chuckle. I couldn’t blame her and managed a giggle myself.
“Slamming his penis against the table…” She was starting to loose it now. “God, that was priceless! And your reaction!” I couldn’t help laughing with her, even while blushing. “Damn, girl. You almost ripped that thing—Monster—off in concern.” She gasped, howled, and gasped again—trying to get herself under control.
The horror of what I had done, hurting him, flooded over me. I started to cry.
“Becky, it’s okay. Really. It is okay. One thing you will learn, the penis is tough and tender. Just like a male ego.”
I think I managed my best poleaxed steer impersonation.
Mom just laughed at my expression. It was a gentle laugh, not at all mocking. “With experience, honey, you’ll understand. That, and you can always ask me about it.”
“I’ll try, Mom. I will.”
“Don’t say try, Becky. Either do something or don’t. You either succeed or fail. Try doesn’t exist. I’m here to help you. Sometimes, that will mean picking you up when you fall, like tonight. Okay?”
“Now, the second thing. Are you prepared for tomorrow night?”
“Prepared? Huh?” That stunned bovine was back again.
“Prepared. First, are you protected?”
“Yes, I got the shot yesterday.” She gave me a grin and a wink.
“Good. Aside from being responsible, that should help you with your periods as well.”
“That’s part of being open. And periods are part of being a woman.”
“You’re right. It’s going to take me a while.”
“I know, sweetheart. You’re doing great so far.” The squeeze of her hand confirmed the warmth and love in her eyes.
“Now, what about wardrobe?”
“Huh? I’ve been going around naked all week, if you hadn’t noticed!” We both giggled at that.
“Trust me on this. If you walk out of the bathroom in something special, you’ll really arouse him. Plus, you give him the joy of undressing you.”
“Huh?” I seem to be saying that a lot these days. Well, the last two days, anyway.
“You’re going to remember tomorrow night, or whenever it happens, for the rest of your life. Trust me on this. You only get one chance to make it special.”
“O-kay…. What do you mean ‘if it happens’?”
“Nature has a way of changing your plans. I hope everything goes as planned, you just never know.”
“I can buy that. Now, what do I wear? I haven’t a clue.”
“I’ll help you tomorrow, if you let me.” I could see the faraway look in her eyes and a flash of a special time in years gone by.
“Thank you!” I stood and helped her up. We hugged. Damn, did that feel good. I’m convinced now that hugs are addictive and good for you.
“Still feel like a slut?”
“What about Rosalee and Alice?” I had told her ALL about my day while we were shopping and fixing dinner. Or, maybe that was the pod person.
“It sounds like Alice was experimentation. Rosalee…. That’s something you, she, and Luis need to work through. Soon.”
“I guess. It’s… It’s weird.”
“You have a big heart. You’ll do the right thing. I wouldn’t worry about it. You know I’ll support you no matter what you do.”
“Thanks.” I got one of those hugs I’ve become addicted to.
“Well, shall we let the others back in so we can finish dinner? I’m sure you want to show him your etchings later.”
“Don’t give me that, young lady. I expect you to take him to your room tonight and let him know how much you love him. He can stay the night if you want.”
“Wow! Thanks. But, I don’t think so tonight. I know he’s got to be dead on his feet. Jason says they put him through the ringer today. Twice.” Was that the pod person or the shock stunned one?
“Your call, dear. Now, let’s get our men back in here so we can go back to fondling their cocks.”
“What? You think you were the only one? Even Cheryl was playing the game.”
“Huh?” That damned bull with the headache was back.
“For someone that is normally so observant you are missing so much! I think you’re head-over-heels, aren’t you?”
“Huh?” Pod or poleaxe?
“Let’s just get everyone in here and finish the main course. We’ll have lots of time to talk. Okay?”
“Okay… I think.”
“Trust me, Becky.”
“I will, Mom.” We hugged again, fiercely. I did trust her, completely.
We walked into the kitchen and hugged our significant others and led them back to the dining room.
“Jason, see if Cheryl will let you up so you two can join us for the rest of the meal.” Mom couldn’t keep a straight face when she was yelling into the darkened family room. We all laughed.
“Just… A… Minute… Mom…” Was Jason’s breathy reply. He must be lifting weights. Yeah, about 120 pounds worth! Damn. I blushed and got excited at the same time. I’m glad we had put towels down on the dining room chairs.
Walking back into the dining room, I had a chance to check out the table for the first time. We had been so busy getting ready, I hadn’t had the chance before now. Everything did look perfect, even though we had already dug in. The platter of lamb was perfect. Everything had turned out the way I saw it my head. Inside, I clapped my hands and did a little happy dance.
I really have to ask Luis about this music. It really flows, but there is an abstractness to it. Maybe Daddy can help me and I’ll surprise My Mountain. If only I hadn’t tried to put my boyfriend out of commission! I put my hand on his leg—near his knee, when he sat down after doing the gentlemanly thing for me. My Mountain. My Knight. Literally, my savior and protector.
“I’m sorry for hurting you. I promise to be more gentle in the future. Forgive me?”
“Becca, I love you. Nothing to forgive.” He kissed me. With his hand on the back of my head, I did my best to devour his tongue.
“Get a room, you two!” Jason demanded. I laughed with the rest, although I did sort of blush. I get so wrapped up in Luis that I blank everyone else out. I hadn’t heard Jason or Cheryl return.
Conversation started again, as if nothing had happened. It seemed more relaxed now, it flowed. The music… Oh! I know this! Crosby, Stills, and somebody. About teaching your parents, I think.
The food was wonderful. Our secret ingredient really did make the lamb. It was a marvel watching My Mountain and Jason inhale the food. My hand was near enough to Junior, that I could feel him pulse every time Luis had some of the lamb. I think Daddy spent most of the meal carving more for the boys than eating his own food.
As the food disappeared, Daddy got our attention. “Helen, Becky, such a wonderful feast. The lamb is perfection. The beauty of the presentation, and our serving wenches… it is beyond the worthiness of us mortal men. Gentlemen, I think a toast of appreciation is in order. Luis, would you do the honors?”
“Err—Thank you, Jim.” My Mountain rose and raised his goblet. “To Helen, for passing down a tradition from her family. To Rebbecca, for learning it, well. To Cheryl, for adding her beauty to our Outreach. To our fair lamb… We’ve enjoyed you almost as much as the beauty and grace of these fine women. Thank you all.” He raised his goblet.
Daddy and Jason stood, “Here, here!”
They each offered to clink—does pewter clink or clunk?–with their significant others first, then each of the other fair maidens. Finally, they clunked-okay, stick with clinked—their three together. Fair Maidens. In that moment, I knew a painting I had to do of Luis. The Great Warrior preparing for battle. His nude form coated with oil, his armor arrayed around him. His concubines (I almost thought odalisques, but those are virgins and these girls aren’t) beginning to dress him. The muscles pumped up, yet relaxed. The glow of an orgasm radiating from him. And, them.
Conversation stayed light until the last knife, the last fork was resting on empty plates. Mom even agreed to share the lamb receipt with Luis, less the family’s secret ingredient.
“Helen, you can trust me with your family secret.” My Mountain said pleadingly.
“Luis, I trust you with my daughter, but this… Talk to Becky about it. She’s the new keeper of the family secret.” I only half-listened to the continued buttering up. Mom had just entrusted a family secret to me? As I digested that, I looked over at her. I saw the love and affection in her towards me—connection.
“Luis, My Mountain, I promise to make this for you, sometimes. I may even let you help. But, the secret ingredient? Well, that’s not mine to share outside of the family.” I gave Mommy a wink and a smile. She beamed back at me. I reached over and gave Junior a gentle tug to distract my man.
“Luis,” my Father said with mock seriousness, “I was thrown out of the kitchen while they were making this… this…” he looked at the remains of the lamb with a sad look. Oh no, he didn’t like it! “Masterpiece!”
Good, no need to dig his grave tonight. Mom signaled her agreement. Although, keelhauling for teasing was still a possibility.
I let the conversation swirl around me while I thought about my erotic dreams. The music was helping me drift. My dad sure has strange tastes. Good, but strange. The current song has something to do about knights, satin, and the moon.
My hero was always based on a larger-than-life character who swept me off my feet and took me—ravished me. Here I am, sitting next to my larger-than-life hero! He’s swept me off my feet, now it’s time he took me. I reached over and gave Junior a little squeeze. My Mountain looked down at me and smiled. I melted, oozing over the sides of the dining room chair.
Mom caught my eye. Loving is the only way I can describe her eyes. I saw a glint of moisture, a small tear forming at the corner. I could feel the happiness and love she wanted me to find. I felt our secret ingredient forming in my eyes as well. Discreetly, she wiped the corner of her eye and winked. I wiped mine and gave her a wink back. My hand found its way back to Junior.
My mountain was in such trouble! With the backing of two incredible women… No, add Francesa. Oh, and Ms. Carlisle. And Mrs. Grant. Rosalee! I had an Army! Wow!
Mom and I served dessert and pleasant noises were made all around. I fed Luis and he attempted to feed me, but I didn’t give him many chances. I was so lost in thoughts of tomorrow night and giving myself to him that I can’t even remember what we made! That, and I kept falling into his eyes. Dark and deep. Gentle and intense.
As the meal wound down, Mom and I attempted to get up and clear the table. Daddy stopped us.
“My Fair Ladies, you prepared this perfect meal. It is only right that your warriors now step forward to battle the kitchen.” With that, the guys tackled the dishes and carried their plunder off. Mom topped off her wine and mine, giving Cheryl a token half-goblet.
Mom broke the silence at the table. “I like the Program. Best family meal I’ve had in a long time.”
“I feel… special? No, honored! Yes, honored to be, like, here and share this.” Cheryl said.
“How are you and Jason doing now?” Mom asked.
“Much better now. Me being gone most of the summer and then, like, when I get back, he’s off to football camp. Like, that almost killed us.”
“He’s over it now?”
“Yeah, and I’m almost over his…” I faded out. I thought I was close to Jase. Well, he was closer to me than anyone else before this week, yet I didn’t know about Cheryl. God, I’ve really been selfish the last few years. My hiding was just another excuse to be self-centered. I had been alone not because no one would have anything to do with me. I had been alone because I had pushed everyone away.
“Uh, yes, Mom?” Internally, I shook the pity-party off.
“Any advice you can give Cheryl about dating a football player?” She discreetly winked at me.
Our conversations earlier rolled over me. Apparently, Jase and Cheryl had hooked up off-season.
“Please, call me Cheri.” I smiled and winked at her. Chair-ee… Bim-Bo. The lights are on and no one is home.
“Cheri, you have to understand their week and the different demands on them.”
“Yeah, I think I do. They, like, play games on Friday and have practice until dinner time during the week.” And the giggle. Oh my!
“Yes, and…?” Something I learned from my Father.
“Well, like, what’s with the rest of the week?” Do we females really whine like that? Am I coloring my perceptions of her with my own stories? The music answered my question. All that hammered in was round-a-bout.
“What do you mean?”
“One day he’s got more energy than, like, a nuclear power plant, the next day he’s, like, wiped out. There are days he hurts for no apparent reason.”
Yes! I got it! I understood! I can help! She’s not really a bimbo, just tuned into her peers and not into Jason! She’s going round-a-bout. Stuck! “Let me walk you through the week, okay?”
“Yeah, I guess.” I could see the act in the feigned reluctance now that I knew what to look for. Interesting. Want to see a bimbo, see one. Want to look past it, then you see the person.
“Cheri, it is real important. I grew up with Jason and now Luis—I have to survive the week with them.” Although she was nodding, I could tell the Vacancy sign was ‘like’ still on. “On Monday’s, they get up early and start their first serious work out since the game on Friday. Jason gets up an hour earlier than I do, Luis even earlier. They run. They run over five miles. Luis lifts weights. Then, about the time we’re struggling with the day, they get ready and go to the gym before school starts for more of a workout. So, while we’re working hard to not surrender to our sleep, they’ve already had more physical activity than I’m going to have in a month.”
The vacancy light was starting to flicker like a cheap neon sign.
“I’ve seen Luis’s home weight set, I couldn’t lift the bar by itself, much less with weights on it. He says it’s a light set compared to what he uses at school. They both eat breakfasts that would kill us normal humans.” Mom grunted in agreement.
The sign was now flashing on and off in a regular beat.
“Monday afternoon is a team meeting. They review their plays from the Friday before and look at what their opponents have been doing.”
“So, it’s easy or something.” She said with certainty. The light was staying on more than off, suddenly.
“Not physically. Um… ever had someone film a mistake you made and then show it over and over again?”
Ah, back to a uniform blinking now. Her eyes were starting to round. I was actually getting through! Plus, freaking myself out that I was putting all this together. Thanks Mom, I tried… no, attempted to tell her quickly with my eyes.
“Now, imagine in that room is the head football coach, the assistant coaches, and all your teammates. And they show the clip of your mistake over and over and over. Commenting, critiquing the whole time.”
Her perfectly round eyes and open mouth mirrored the way I felt inside, living through this for the first time with Luis and looking outside myself. I realized that strength is not always on the outside. ‘In and around the lake…’ echoed in my head.
“On Tuesday, they do the hard workouts. An athlete in excellent condition takes three days to recover from a strenuous workout, which will give them greater strength and stamina. Tuesday is their day. Both boys ran over eight miles together this morning, then hit the gym for a workout before school. After school, Luis spent two hours being tortured in the weight room, then practice. In practice, they walk through plays over and over. Plus, for some, a special practice in the gym. Jason went through something similar, but probably not as brutal. I know Luis has to hurt right now.”
“What… what about Jason?” Her voice beginning to quiver as the Vacancy sign finally turned off.
“You’ll have to ask him. I imagine he does. I know he sleeps like a log on Tuesday nights.”
“The rest of the week?” She was… crushed? Becoming attuned? Hmm…
“The next two days are pretty much the same, without the brutal workouts. They’ll wear full uniforms for the next two days and push a little harder tomorrow. But, not much. They don’t want anyone injured during practice.”
“I don’t think I understand all of it. The practices, at least.” Looking into her eyes, I realized she’s not a bimbo after all. No way. She seems pretty smart. I’m glad Jason is not dating a complete airhead like he has in the past.
“Ever work on dance moves?” She nodded. “You practice the moves over and over until they become automatic. You don’t have to think about them, right?”
“Yes!” Understanding dawning bright in yon window. I’ve got to stop reading so much Shakespeare.
“Football is like a complex dance. The offense, Jason’s side of the team, is trying to create moves that Luis’s side of the team, the defense, can’t match. The defense is trying to do the same thing to foil the offense. They practice against each other all week, then we get to see how well they’ve done on Friday.”
“I see it now. Wow!” She processed it for a moment. “How did you get so smart about football?”
“I grew up around it and just absorbed it.”
Mom spoke up, “We’ve always gone to each of Jason’s games and he talks about it all season.”
“I don’t know a lot, just what I’ve observed and heard. Luis is the real student of the game. I like the games, it is a great way to see muscles in motion.” We all giggled at that, I’m sure for different reasons. I was thinking about studying muscles for art. Then I remembered the last two days. Okay, maybe we were giggling for the same reason! I felt my cheeks warm and was again glad for the towel on the chair.
“So, like anything, if you want to be good…” Cheri started.
“Practice, practice, practice!” Mom and I said at the same time. We all broke up at that.
Cheri, Mom, and I drifted off into taking about classes, colleges, and—pinch me—girl stuff. After missing the last five years, I was catching up on clothes, boys, music, boys, makeup, boys, hairstyles, boys, dance moves, boys, gossip… Mom was right on top of it too.
For the first time in my life, I felt like a normal teenage girl. I liked it. No! I reveled in it.
Jim, Jason, and I cleared the dishes and tackled the kitchen. Jim directed his troops and in short order the place was squared away. In the process, we prepared tea, coffee, and brandy, which we placed on a silver serving tray with all the necessaries. Jason was “volunteered” to carry it in to our ladies.
Jim looked at me after Jason left. “Are you okay?”
“Yes, si… Sorry. Yes, Jim. Just tired. Today was ‘kill me to make me a better lineman and person’ day. I think a good portion of it was penance for what I did to Dr. C.”
“I’m sure you’ll sleep well tonight.”
“I’m already dreading moving when I wake up. And, then, a long run to loosen up! Argh!” Jim shared an easy, sympathetic laugh with me.
“Luis,” he turned very serious. “I meant what I said earlier.”
I think I had my clueless look on. That one that comes from having your brains sucked into a black hole. Addled-Brain Syndrome (ABS).
“About being available to you to help with your future. I’ve known your father for years. I see in you all the things that make him the best in his profession—a quick, disciplined mind plus the ability to synthesize as well as analyze.. I also see in you your mother’s dedication, hard work, and passion for life.” He paused and a bit of moisture appeared in his eyes. “In two days, you’ve given Helen and I our daughter back.” He visibly pulled himself together. “I would help out of respect for your parents. Now, I want to out of respect for you.”
“Thank you, sir.” I thought about that for a microsecond. It was proper. There was more than a bit of moisture in my eyes. “I’m going to take you up on it. After this week?”
A smile split his face and total understanding illuminated his eyes.
“Deal!” We shook hands.
“I see the way you look at my daughter.” The sands of the Sahara washed through my mouth. I’m sure fear covered my face. My mouth stopped working for a second.
“It’s the same way I think I look at Helen. I know Becky looks at you the same way Helen looks at me. Are you ready for it?”
“It?” Can you say confusion? ABS! Damn that black hole. I just wished it would suck up the moisture building in my throat. That flood before you void your stomach.
“A very serious relationship.”
I relaxed, my chest actually heaved in relief and I chuckled internally. Just once. “Yes sir. More than ready. I wasn’t until yesterday. Now, I know in my heart I’m more than ready.”
He thought for a moment, nodded his head, and gave me a playful punch on the arm. “You’ll do just fine.”
I know I still had that vacuous cranium look, ’cause that’s how I felt. Breathe, you dumb jock, breathe!
His chest shook with a few internal chuckles. “All I can say is pick your advisors well. Your parents for one. I’d be honored. Helen would be another good choice. I’m sure you’ve got some trusted friends as well. We can all help make it work.”
It had been one hell of a day. I was physically hanging by a thread. Emotionally, I was everywhere.
“Thanks.” I think I got out. My body suddenly felt like a plate of jelly in a microwave. His smile told me he took pity on me.
“Come to any of us. Questions. Concerns. Advice. You’ll figure it out. We’re here to help.”
My brain was still vacuum addled at this point. Yet, when I looked him in his eyes, I understood how he had gotten to his position in life and why Poppa respected him.
“Jim, thank you.” I stuck out my hand and we shook again. His other covering mine.
“Let’s go treat the ladies with the love they deserve.” The twinkle and energy in his eyes looked just like Poppa’s. It was contagious.
“Charge!” It was all I could think of. Yep, there’s that Contadino wit bursting forth again.
“Into the fray for God and Country!” He chuckled as we headed back into the dining room with Jim’s excellent collection of classic 70s rock playing. The Moody Blues were on. Same album as Knights in White Satin. Kewl.
We had a comfortable and, fortunately, short after-dinner conversation. I had a cup of Darjeeling tea, as did Becca. Jim and Helen had snifters of brandy and cups of coffee. Jason and Cheryl sipped water.
I couldn’t help it. It snuck up on me. I yawned. Big! No way to hide it. Of course, my yawn triggered Jason. His triggered my second one, which triggered his second one. All those yawn-neutrinos bouncing around causing others to join in.
“Becky,” Helen got her attention, I was in mid-yawn, trying not to expose the Grand Canyon to everyone. “You wanted Luis to see your portfolio?”
“Mmm… Yeah.” She looked a little sheepish; her cheeks turned a bit rosy. Damn, I love looking at her.
“Well, before he falls asleep…” Becca got it. She grabbed my hand, “helped” me up, and led me to the stairs. As we got to the first tread, my energy picked up. To be allowed in Becca’s room, to see her paintings, and to make out a bit. I know I hurried her up the steps. Her ass cheek fit perfectly in my hand. Not to mention how good it felt. Yep. Male. Subspecies: teenager. Distinguishing behavior: horny while breathing.
She stood in front of her door and made no move to open it. I could see fear and doubt in her eyes. A glint of moisture. She hung her head and her hair became a curtain closing over her face.
“My Becca, it’s okay. We don’t have to do this.”
She melted into me. “I want you to see my work, I’m just…”
Do all males have the stupid gene? Or a missing gene? Maybe it’s that missing chain that makes us a Y instead of another X. “You invited me upstairs to see your etchings.”
Dumb. Stupid. REALLY DUMB. I wanted to reach out and pull all those words back.
Instead of being upset, she cracked up! She looked up from her Cave. “You say the sweetest things.” And, she kissed me. No. She KISSED me. As in make the world go away and curl my toes.
Okay, what’s going on? Before I could even think about it, she opened her bedroom door and propelled a suddenly weightless me in. If East’s line only knew!
My knees weakened. Her art was everywhere. I was bombarded like a loose ball on the playing field.
The first sketch I saw made me want to laugh. It reminded me of a Marx Brothers movie that my parents had forced me to watch and I came to love: “A Day at the Races.” I felt it in my bones. Dr. Hugo Z. Hackenbush right in front of me. Yet, the sketch had nothing to do with the movie or the Marx Brothers!
My eyes were next pulled to one that made my muscles relax. I felt myself automatically drop into my center, combat mode. It was a simple sketch of two people in a bare room.. I just knew, though, a fight was imminent.
The next was just the face of a little girl, but it brought tears to my eyes. My throat closed in sadness and pain. I pulled my eyes away.
Then I saw the painting on the easel. It immediately drew me in. Captivated would be a good word. Enthralled? How about mesmerized? The rest of the room melted as I went through a series of emotional releases. I wanted to cry while leaping with joy. I wanted to dance in the moonlight and wail at the Wall. Becca saw my face and hugged me.
“Thank you,” was all she whispered.
“Becca… That is… WOW!” Tears were streaming down my cheeks. My heart was leaping, skipping, running with joy.
“You’ve just given me the best compliment anyone could.”
Tears of joy and sadness, hope in my heart, questions in my mind. I was still whirling when I managed to pull Becca to me. “Thank you…”
My throat closed. My eyes watered. The girl that knows how to draw and paint like this loves me? My knees started to buckle. Becca seemed to effortlessly carry me to her bed.
“Wow! I didn’t… realize… how… good… you are!” Her mouth touched mine. The shock through my system woke me up more than a can of energy drink and a shot in the arm.
I felt every part of her lips. The heat. The moisture. The little valleys and ridges. When her lips opened, she effortlessly parted mine. Her tongue came out and began to tease my lips and teeth. Her hand snaked around my head and she pushed me into her. My world became her lips, tongue, breath, and her heartbeat. Her warmth flowed through me.
The kiss deepened. Instead of feeling sexual, it was a deepening expression… love? Our hearts started to beat in the same rhythm. I felt her heart more than my own, the energy running through her and into me. Even though I was bending over to reach her mouth, it wasn’t uncomfortable at all. She melded with me, her body pressed into mine until we became one.
As our kiss broke, we still gave each other little kisses, refusing to pull away. No talk. No need. What we had went beyond words. I knew in that moment why poets struggled to say what couldn’t be said. The compelling need to say it and impossibility of limiting the feeling with mere words.
We finally pulled away from each other, keeping eye contact.
“WOW!” I’m not sure how I found the breath.
“Yeah, WOW!” With her words caressing my ears, I could fall into and live in her eyes forever.
“Becca, I love you.” Our hearts still beat as one. No lightning bolts from heaven… or hell. Just ’tis.
“And, I love you, Luis. Now and forever. No matter what happens.” Our world swirled into a kaleidoscope of infinite possibilities. Together. One.
“And I you.” What else could the dumb jock say? We melted into a second kiss.
This kiss deepened, yet I was very aware of her physical presence. The hardening of her nipples, the warmth hidden behind her pubic hair—the building moisture as well. The complex, beautiful curve of her breasts and hips flowed beneath my fingers. The soft, yet strong feeling of her ass as I cupped the cheeks. The smoothness of her flesh and how the muscles underneath rippled and seemed to be following my fingers and hands.
While our breathing and hearts synced, I could feel my hands on her as if I were her. I felt her inside me feeling her hands and fingers on me.
Coherent thought ceased.
Einstein, Feynman, and Hawkins would be proud. We stopped time.
Again, when we broke, those wonderful, intimate little kisses. I pulled back a little bit so I could see her face. “If today had been different…”
More little kisses. Fingers touching, exploring the other half of the new self.
She smiled. “And, if today hadn’t been ‘Kill Luis’ in the weight room, I would attack you!”
“You mean?!?” ABS Alert!
“I told you yesterday. I meant it. I live with a football player, though, and know the weekly routine.”
“And, you want to?” Smooth, Luis. Smooth. Taking the remedial fuckwit class next week? And you spell it m-o-r-a-n.
“Luis, you may want to become a rocket scientist, but you are such a dweeb at times. What do you think? What did you feel in our kisses just now?”
“Love. Absolute. Oneness. The infiniteness of the universe and the singularity just before the Big Bang.”
“Imagine how that’s going to be when Junior is inside me.” I shuddered. She melted. “Tomorrow, My Mountain, My Love. Tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” The Addled Brain Alert was now a five alarmer.
“Trust me.” I found myself filled with her love. I did trust her. Completely.
We melted into another of our now patented kisses. When we broke, I knew what I wanted right then. “Show me your art, please.”
She looked up at me. Every fiber of my being wanted to join with her—wanted to make sweet, gentle love to her. I didn’t know how. My experience to date was frustration. It all came flooding back. The few times I’d penetrated another… the pain, for both of us. The frustrations. The emptiness. I needed more strength than I had right now.
We were still connected. One energy.
“Sweetie, it’s my first time too.” I felt her fear, doubts. I heard her words. Our joint energy melted both of our concerns. Our hearts were one. One energy. One mind. No fears. Fullness. One.
We shared another deepening with our lips, arms, naked flesh, breath, and souls.
“Tomorrow, my love.” After a quick kiss that lingered on my lips, she turned on some music and took me on a tour of her art. We went through her portfolio for college admissions—we needed to talk about that, soon.
“We will,” came into my head without words. The connection still there.
I took a minute to find another station. One where the songs were based on more than two guitar chords. She smiled when I did.
Then her other active projects, finally the Inspiration Wall, as she called it. Instantly, I fell in love with one of the sketches. It was a self-portrait.
“Sweetie?” I nuzzled her neck, “If you choose to archive this, may I have it?” Her eyes moistened with my request. In this one sketch, I could see what she had hidden all these years, her very soul. Now that I had felt it, I wanted this sketch. I needed that for a daily reminder, a reconnection. Either that, or the finished product. No, the rough sketch was perfect. Greatness to become. Like us.
She looked at me very seriously, “I think I know why, but tell me.”
I studied her eyes and saw her soul, again. “Because, when I look at this, I feel you, like I’m seeing you now. And I want to keep feeling that, everyday.”
Three nanoseconds later I had a warm, huggable girl in my arms and we were deeply involved in another of our special kisses. I’d picked the perfect radio station. Just my Imagination came flowing through and into our kisses.
Two, maybe three, millennia later, when we did our “come back to the moment” kissy routine, I had to say, “Just like I feel your soul when we kiss.”
She hit me in the chest! My eyes popped wide open. “Bastard!”
If she hadn’t had one hand around my neck, I might have gotten upset. Instead, I kissed her. Just a short one and then looked into her eyes again.
“Is that wrong of me?” I asked her.
“Yes!” And, she started to cry on my chest. So, I wrapped her up into our Cave. Yes, it works for me too. Oh! Did her definition of the Cave work for me too! My Becca snuggled into my chest, our hearts touching? Definitely, YES!
“Is it wrong that I feel your heart beat and I want to feel it when I’m not around you? Is it wrong to see the hidden you, the real you, and us together in that one piece? Is it wrong to be overwhelmed by it?”
She pounded my chest.
“Why… do… y-you… see me… s-so well?” Amidst her crying, she snorkeled.
I couldn’t help it. I chuckled. I got hit on the chest again, she snorkeled again. I chuckled more. She snorted.
“Should I get a towel?” I put an image in my mind of a waiter bowing. We both lost it and collapsed together. Laughter pushed tears and tension right out the window.
“Now, show… me… your etchings.” I managed to get out around my laughter.
“Better etchings than a puddle.” That just got us going again. She rammed a finger into my ribs attempting to tickle me. I took the softer approach with light fingertip touches. We were successful in producing copious quantities of laughter, but not the accident. Our connection grew stronger.
We made a half-assed attempt to finish going through her work. I really wanted to be fresh and be able to focus for her. Somewhere around her third stifled yawn, I made up my mind and pulled her to me.
“Sweetie, why don’t we do this another time when we’re both fresh. We’re both wiped out from today.”
“I’m sorry…” She was interrupted by yet another yawn.
“It’s okay, love, believe me. They nearly killed me in the weight room. I know only part of that was getting ready for East.”
“The rest because of this morning?”
“Yep.” She snuggled as we sat on the floor of her closet. I didn’t want to leave, but I had to. I knew how I would feel in the morning already. Plus, I had to do some homework, stuff for the Naked Project, and some things for the game.
Do you know how hard it is to get off a closet floor with a girl snuggled into your chest? Wearily, we made our way down the stairs. The yawn-neutrinos were bouncing everywhere. Her parents were in the family room enjoying a movie. Helen hit pause when we came in.
“So, what have you kids been up to?” Jim asked, with a sly grin on his face.
“Becca was showing me her etchings.” I managed that with a straight, but tired, face.
“I haven’t heard that in a while,” Helen said. That caused her and Becca to crack up.
Jim and I shared a look that simply said, “Women.”
For some reason, we all laughed.
After calming down, we all went through the pleasantries, thanks, and goodbyes. I got a very sweet kiss that was pure love and a promise of a wonderful future. Then, out the door.
The rest of the evening was a bit of a haze. When I dragged myself in the door, my father didn’t even ask me to sit and talk, just bid me on my way. In honor of the earlier kisses, I hit my Motown mix when I got downstairs. I finished a paper in PoliSci, which, thankfully, only needed a few minor changes. Then I drew up the play changes based on today’s walk-thrus. I handled a few Naked Program emails, but really couldn’t focus that well.
Bed called. Junior told me I wasn’t Becca and to leave him alone. I fell asleep while my head was still moving towards the pillow. The Temptations sliding away.
As soon as the front door closed, I yawned again. Luis’s sweet taste still on my lips. His scent lingering in my head. I managed to stumble into the family room and sat on the sofa next to Mom.
“Long day, huh?” She said as she brushed the hair out of my face and gently rubbed my neck.
“Too long.” I felt like purring at her touch.
“Some days happen like that,” Daddy said. His voice full of love and support.
“So, when’s the big moment?” Mom’s gentle massage was turning me into putty. I didn’t even care that my father was in the room.
“Tomorrow night. I’m spending the night at his house.” Wow! I guess the pod person running my life had made a firm commitment!
“Are you ready?” It wasn’t a challenge, just a check-in.
“More than ready. I wanted to tonight when I was…” I yawned again.
“Showing your etchings?” Daddy finished with a chuckle.
“I can’t believe I’m having this conversation.” I yawned again. Mom’s fingers were performing pure magick. I was totally relaxed. I could feel every bone in my body turning to jelly.
“I’m glad we can support you, Becky.” Mom’s love poured out and washed over me.
“I was a fool…”
“Becky, no regrets. No recriminations. Move forward. Learn from the past, don’t live in it.” Daddy’s voice just flowed through me and made me feel so loved and supported. I laid my head back as my neck totally relaxed. My eyelids suddenly weighed more than Luis.
“I love the both of you.” I couldn’t open my eyes. Then, I couldn’t think of a single reason to. Mom pulled my head to her lap and worked on my shoulders and back muscles.
I vaguely remember Mom and Dad tucking me into my bed and kissing me. I smiled and got all squiggly inside when they both said they loved me and called me Becky. How I got there, I don’t know.
I pried my eyes open and looked at my likeness of Luis. “’Night, Sweetie. Love you.”
I sank into a deep, deep sleep. Scotland would have to wait… again.